Focus on One Person at a Time Before and After a Presentation While Maintaining Eye Contact

Just a few days ago, I met a speaker after the speaker’s presentation. We started a conversation and then, all of a sudden, seemed distracted by others in the room. I lost this person’s contact . Was she focusing on someone else? Was she listening-even hearing-what I was saying? I wasn’t sure, so what did I do? I finished, perhaps my one-sided, conversation, with, “Well, it was nice talking to you” and simply left. Has this happened to you?

Before you begin a presentation, you generally should mingle with your audience, and then after the presentation, you should again take the opportunity to meet with your audience to answer questions and to proceed with your back of the room sales (if you have products). However, this is not the purpose of this article.

The purpose of this article is about focusing on one person at a time when you are mingling with the audience before and after your presentation.

Have you been to a networking group and met someone and as soon as you begin conversing, he/she begins to shop the room? How did you feel? Small? Not important? Slighted?

President Reagan, and even President Clinton, were known to be quite attentive when speaking to others. Even thought they were former presidents, if you were able to converse with them, you had their fullest attention. It was as if nothing else mattered. How would you feel? Important? Respected?

Perhaps there may be a time when you want to meet a particular person and you notice him/her. What do you do? Do you abruptly leave the person with whom you were conversing? Do you say, “Just a sec!” and rush to meet this other person? I’ve seen these scenarios far too often. What I try the best to do is to be truthful and ask, “I really have been wanting to meet Mr/Ms. So and So. Do you mind if I leave you for a moment? I’ll return immediately after I meet this person.” Then when you meet this person, you may speed up your meeting by saying, “…I really would like to have a few minutes with you; however, I’m busy with this other person. Could we meet in 30 minutes at…or immediately after dinner?”

When you are meeting the members of the audience, either before or after your presentation, you should:

* Be attentive, make eye contact, and listen when someone is speaking.
* Avoid shopping the room as you talk.
* Be truthful if you happen to see someone you really must meet.

Great Salary Negotiation Tips

11 Commandments For Smart Negotiating


The more information you have about your market value and the
prospective employer, the greater your likelihood of success. This
is the first commandment because it’s the most important. There’s a
wealth of information available on the Internet, at the public library
and through professional associations and networking groups. Time
spent learning how to negotiate and preparing for negotiations may be
the best investment you’ll ever make.


When the negotiations are over, you’ll have to work with the person
with whom you’re negotiating. Moreover, your future success may depend
on that person. So, while you want to negotiate the best possible
deal, you need to do so in a way that doesn’t damage your image. At
the same time, the employer’s primary concern isn’t negotiating the
least expensive compensation package it can get away with. Rather,
their focus will be on getting you to accept the job.


To be successful in this type of negotiation, you need to examine your
priorities. What do you really want? Are you comfortable with a low
salary and a large equity stake? Are you able to handle dramatic
swings in income from year to year? Understanding your needs will also
help you determine the type of company you want to work for. For
example, a family-owned company may be able to offer a competitive
salary and a large bonus based on results, but may not be willing to
offer significant equity to a non-family member. A start-up company,
on the other hand, may not be able to offer market salary, but will
typically offer stock options. By recognizing what an employer can and
can’t do, you’ll be able to determine what issues you should press.


Sometimes you’ll have skills that are in great demand. And sometimes,
you may be one of several qualified candidates the company would be
happy to hire. Sizing up the situation and understanding the relative
position of each party will help you determine when to press your
advantage and when to back off.


It’s not only wrong to lie, but in employment negotiations, it’s
ineffective. If you lie during negotiations, sooner or later you’re
likely to be caught. Once you are, even if you don’t lose the offer,
you’ll be at a tremendous disadvantage, and your credibility will
always be suspect. On the other hand, total candor wont be rewarded.
You’re under no obligation to blurt out everything you know. You can
determine what you want to say and how you want to say it, and try to
put everything in its most positive light. One key element of your
preparation should be to recognize areas of concern so you can
rehearse how to handle them when they inevitably come up.


The guiding principle for most employers when negotiating is fairness.
Within the constraints of their budget and organizational structure,
employers usually will agree to anything that’s fair and reasonable to
hire someone they want. Appeals to fairness are your most powerful
weapon. Thus, you should be able to justify every request you make in
terms of fairness. For example, if other computer programmers in
similar companies are being given sign-on bonuses, you should expect
to be treated no differently. Your prospective employer will want you
to accept it’s offer and feel that you’ve been treated fairly.
Understanding the importance of fairness as a negotiating principle
can make the difference between success and failure.


The more information you convey to a potential employer about your
bottom line, the more likely it will limit what you get. Before making
an offer, a company typically tries to determine what it will take for
you to accept the position. With that information, the prospective
employer will be able to determine the minimum package it needs to
offer. While they may not offer you as little as they can get away
with, if you’ve divulged too much information, they likely wont offer
you as much as they might have otherwise. By not disclosing exactly
what your current compensation is or exactly what it would take to get
you to leave your job, you’ll force a potential employer to make it’s
best offer.


Consider the value of the total package. Look for different ways to
achieve your objectives. Be willing to make tradeoffs to increase the
total value of the deal. If you’re creative, you can package what you
want in ways that will be acceptable to the company. You’ll also be
able to find creative “trades” that allow you to withdraw requests
that might be problematic to the company in return for improvements in
areas where the company has more flexibility. That way, you can
maximize the value of the package you negotiate.


Too often in negotiations, the act of winning becomes more important
than achieving your goals. And it’s also important not to make your
future boss feel as if he’s lost in the negotiations. You’ll have
gained little by negotiating a good deal if you alienate your future
boss in the process.


The one sure way to lose everything you’ve obtained is to be greedy.
There comes a point in every negotiation when you’ve achieved
everything you could have reasonably expected to gain. While most
companies will want to treat you fairly and make you happy, few
companies want a to hire a prima donna. Being perceived as greedy or
unreasonable may cause the deal to fall apart. Even if it doesn’t,
you’ll have done immeasurable harm to your career. This brings us to
the 11th and most important commandment:


Job negotiations are the starting point for your career with a
company. Get too little and you’re disadvantaged throughout your
career there; push too hard and you can sour the relationship before
it begins.

Understanding these principles will allow you to effectively negotiate
the terms of your new job. Then do your job well and continually seek
out new challenges. As you take on added responsibilities and learn
new skills, there will be opportunities to negotiate further

This article can also be read directly at:


Nathan Newberger

Managing Editor

“Helping You Find More Jobs Faster”

Successfully Perceive Deception Throughout Negotiations

When you negotiate, how do you detect deception? When negotiating, observing the body language of the other negotiator will give you insight into whether he’s being truthful, or intentionally attempting to mislead you (lying).

When people outright lie that’s deception, but they can also lie unintentionally by misrepresenting a fact they believe to be true. Would you know what to look for to detect lies in either situation? As you negotiate, take into account the following thoughts to detect when someone is not being forthright.

· The eyes may have:

o When questioning the other negotiator about a past situation that he’s not sure of, do his eyes tend to look up and to the left? If so, he’s trying to gain access to the area in the brain that stores past occurrences. In most cases, this is a natural reaction. If he looks up and to the right in the same situation, he’s more than likely in the process of concocting a story that’s born of deceit, or at minimum, he’s mentally contemplating the possibility of leaning in that direction.

· There’s something in the tone:

o Do you lend attention to the tone used by the other negotiator while negotiating? When it comes to deceit, the tone associated with the delivery of a thought or pronouncement will convey the level of conviction and belief that’s attached to it. That of itself will not be a definitive declaration as to whether one’s statement is deceitful. It will however give you a level of insight into how believable he wishes you to perceive it. If the other negotiator allows his tone to consistently trail off at the end of his statements, he’s displaying through the hidden insight of nonverbal, verbal (follow me on this) communications that he’s not sure about what he’s saying. To the degree that you astutely detect his level of uncertainty, you may consider probing further to uncover the ‘real’ story.

· Rephrase and paraphrase questions to seek detail:

o When people lie, by definition, they fabricate a story that’s not truthful. Thus, the more you probe, by asking for detail, the more extensive the lie will become. As you probe deeper, be aware of the other negotiator’s attempt to ‘waive you off’ and move to another topic. If an attempt is made to ‘waive you off’, that of itself will give you insight into the fact that the other negotiator feels uncomfortable and realizes you may be ‘on to him’. He’ll be ‘feeling the heat’ and you may observe him physically ‘tugging’ at his collar.

The above insights will assist you in detecting deceit, most of the time. While no ‘fool proof’ system is available to detect deceit in every situation, the more aware you are of gestures that occur around you during negotiations, the better equipped you’ll be at ferreting out deception. By being observant of body language, you will add another arrow in your quiver from which to defend yourself… and everything will be right with the world.

The Negotiation Tips Are…

· When it comes to detecting deception, be attuned to what you don’t hear and see and what’s not said or shown. The absence of information is information. It’s information you can use in the negotiation.

· Adept negotiators, that know how to read body language and detect deceit, possess more abilities to succeed when negotiating. If you want to become a more dynamic negotiator, increase your deception detection abilities, by improving your body language reading skills.

· When you detect deceit, don’t ‘jump on it’ immediately. Let the other negotiator continue in his dastardly ways. By doing so, you’ll receive insight into how he lies and what he’s attempting to accomplish.